For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.
Rainer Maria Rilke
Referred to as the Helper.
The Type Two individual wants to be liked by those they want to like them, try to meet the needs of others, and attempt to orchestrate the people and events in their lives.
Their primary need is the “Need to be Needed.”
Twos tend to move toward people. They have a marked need for affection and approval. They want to be loved and to be protected. They have a need to feel important in other people’s lives.
They are often preoccupied with relationship and it is the most important area of existence.
Often in relationship two suppress their own needs in the interest of pleasing others. Their control is achieved through helpfulness. If things don’t do as they wish within relationship they can indulge in a great deal of complaining which is their way of making others recognize how much they owe.
The predominant emotion that the Two experiences are one of Pride and Flattery. Pride is referred to as the Passion of Type Two, and Flattery is their Fixation.
The pride of type two is often deceiving and is more like false humility or more specifically self-abnegation. Self-abnegation as the denial of their own needs causing them to prioritize the needs of others.
The fixation of the two is flattery. The flattery convinces them that diminishing themselves through self-abnegation is a legitimate form of love.
The Main Theme of Two
- Survival depends on the love and approval of others
- Being connected in relationship is the main focus of concern and attention
- The emphasis on what others need
- The need to help the cause or person
- Over-extended, dependent and manipulative
The Core Wound
Their needs for love and attention weren’t met, so they developed a belief that their needs are less important than others. They manipulate the outer world to get inner needs met, believe it is selfish to have their own needs met and take care of others to earn their love.
Center of Intelligence: Heart
Interpersonal Coping Style
Dutiful – Act on their feelings to earn love while disconnecting from thinking
The path of Integration for a Two
The path of Integration for a Two is to Four. When the two integrates, they begin to assert themselves by taking back their power and differentiating themselves from those they love. Integrated two may tap into their inner creativity as an act of loving service.
The path of Disintegration for a Two
The way of Disintegration for a Two is to Eight. Along this path, they play manipulative tricks, appealing to their own force of presence to get what they want. They become overly smothering or overly involved, and when they don’t feel appreciated they can become overly controlling.
The Awakened Two
When they can become honest with their needs, and let their needs be met without feeling shame, they allow themselves to receive love in ways they need it and the virtue of humility shines forth. They are able to stand with their heads high. They take ownership of themselves and give of themselves from a place of strength and determination as to the fruit of deep humility.
The Wings
The 2 with a 1 wing tends to be the Servant. They tend to strive for love through goodness and selfless service, motivated by the idea of love, work to treat others fairly and impact others’ lives from the background. They are often in teaching roles. They are able to bring ideas to life. In an unhealthy capacity, they can be self-righteous, inflexible, and moralistic, quick to condemn others while justifying their moral grounds.
The 2 with a 3 wing tends to play Host/Hostess. They seek love through the creation of intimacy and personal creation. They employ charm to win the affection of others. Relationships being their primary focus, they are friendly and outgoing, enjoying the attention of others. In their unhealthy state they are prone to flattery and gossip, exaggerated sentimentality, fears of being humiliated or losing status, manipulative, jealous and hold onto hostility masked through charm.